So what if you have already been affected emotionally by the negativity? You know, the time when
you were not yet aware of the ways on how to deal with negative people; the moment when you were
not yet armed with the weapons on how to fight the negativity in a situation by transforming it
otherwise, because again, we are not against with the negative person per se, but we are in a duel
with the negative vibe that is in the situation.
So what will you do when you have been suffering from emotional feelings brought about by the
negativity? How will you cure these negative emotions and prevent from becoming bigger and affect
others? Also, how do you actually know you are experiencing a negative emotion? What are the
emotional struggles experienced by the receiver of the negative vibe?
Before we go directly with the solutions, the cure of that negative emotion, let us first determine if we
are actually experiencing this kind of feeling. For clarity and ease of comprehension, we shall be
calling the persons who have gotten negative emotionally as the “receiver”, while the individuals
who caused him or her to feel that way as the “sender”.
What Are the Negative Emotions?
Depression
In most cases, this is what the receiver feels after having dealt with negative people. You know, that
moment when you talk with a co-worker for instance, and he or she tells you of the bad things about
the company by showing facts that you yourself are aware of, but you are not just dealing with the
thought because you are looking forward to a positive change. And, because you have personal
knowledge about it, you can easily relate, you can easily be affected emotionally. So there you are;
you also found yourself dwelling with the negative things about the company in your mind and finally
getting depressed at the end. You then begin considering drastic decisions such as finding another
company, resigning, or worst, going on AWOL (Absence Without Official Leave) to thinking about
initial changes like asking to transfer to another department or going to another team. This is a clear
case of successful transfer of negativity. The sender has been successful in making you one of them.
Now, what are the symptoms of depression?
Although the signs vary from person to person, these are the most common ones.
First, you feel helpless or hopeless.
You think that no one can help you get out of the situation even your close friends and that there is no
more reason to stay; that there is nothing that can improve the situation even yourself. It’s like “Okay,
that’s the end of it. There is nothing that can change this. This is a hopeless case and will always be.”
So that is your mindset.
Second, you have lost the interest in typical daily activities.
You feel weak. You become still and stiff. You have no life in you. It’s like everything that surrounds
you is boring and that nothing can bring a smile unto your face. You become like a candle without
flame. You’ve totally lost interest on the things you usually enjoy like hanging out with friends, doing
your favorite hobby, or if in the case of cohabiting or married people, the interest about sex is gone.
You have completely lost your ability to enjoy and be happy.
Third, your appetite has changed.
If you are the type who doesn’t really eat a lot, the opposite happens when you are depressed; you eat
so much, even going beyond what you can imagine. On the contrary, if you are the person who loves
to eat, a feeling of depression can mean losing your appetite. So it’s either you lose or gain too much
weight. You might hear friends saying, “Hey! What happened to you? You look so thin, pale and
weak?” Or, you will notice your friends criticizing your food appetite. They might say, “Hey! Have
you not eaten well at home? You look so hungry. It’s like you can eat all the food here even the plate.
What on earth has happened to you?” So the possibility is you become super thin like supermodels or
fat, even obese like sumo wrestlers.
Fourth, your sleeping pattern has changed.
It is either you can’t sleep or if you do sleep, it is interrupted as you get to wake up earlier than what
is typically expected of your sleeping habit. In some other cases, you experience over sleep or
hypersomnia, the opposite of insomnia in medical parlance. So when you to go to work, school or
anywhere you’re heading on that day, you feel dizzy and sleepy. You might even fall asleep in the
middle of your working hours and leave customers waiting for nothing.
Fifth, you get angry easily.
Even in minor matters, your temper goes high, becoming anger. For instance, someone has just
bumped into you accidentally inside the elevator when you were entering, then you found yourself
screaming to death, shouting like the person is a criminal and has just done a crime to you or like
you’ve seen a ghost. Your reaction becomes way beyond than the normal scenario that people can
grasp and compare. It’s like you are suffering from an abnormal high blood pressure.
Sixth, you feel irritable.
It’s like you are not comfortable with everything even your regular work, which you have been doing
for years, say 5 to 10 years or longer. So you can’t finish tasks on time or entertain clients well
because you are irritable, you can’t decide on things well. You feel agitated. Your tolerance level is
very low, seemingly like everyone and everything is getting in your nerves. So people do not like to
go near you; they keep a distance from you.
Seventh, you have no energy.
In other words, you feel physically drained. You lost the appetite to do things or complete tasks. You
become sluggish and lazy. It’s like whatever you do doesn’t make sense and is useless. Your body
feels heavy like you’re carrying a bag of stones at your back. You lost the energy to perform good that
you can’t even finish small and easy tasks on time. It’s like you feel your fingers are heavy enough to
start typing or your mind drained enough to come up with an idea. During these moments, you can find
yourself staring at the computer screen with a blank mind, seemingly floating in the world of
imagination.
Eight, you hate yourself.
Otherwise referred to as self-loathing, you began to belittle your own self, your own ability, and the
overall you. You learn to hate who you are that you criticize yourself harshly for trivial mistakes. You
feel worthless so you do not like who you are. You even say bad, degrading, dehumanizing words to
yourself. That is why you can’t appreciate or can’t find the reason to smile when someone gives you a
compliment. It’s like thinking, “Who am I to deserve that praise or recognition? I am just a worthless
person. Who would mean that?” Simply, you’ve lost trust and confidence of who you are and what
you can become in the future.
Ninth, you become reckless.
You begin to do things without thinking or caring about their consequences, whether it can cause harm
to yourself or to others. You only think of what can satisfy your desire temporarily. You are not able
to decide on things properly that you tend to find yourself in risky instances such as compulsive
gambling, drug abuse, and reckless driving. So you might get caught into trouble, encounter a fist fight,
a ramble, or even imprisoned.
Tenth, you lose focus.
Because you become a person full of doubt, you tend to overthink negatively, losing concentration.
You know your goals for the day, for instance, but you just can’t achieve them because you have a
distorted mindset. You think that you can’t do the work or that you are not competent to do the work
or that your boss hates you. There are just so many things, conspiracy theories, running through your
head so you can’t really focus. As a result, works become incomplete or way below the standards.
And, you even become forgetful that you fail to turn off the computer or the lights after work, to look
to your left and right before crossing the street, to bring your mobile phone, to call a client, to put
sugar in your coffee, and so on.
Eleventh, you experience unexplainable body aches and pains.
Along with the other symptoms, you’ll find yourself complaining about headaches, back pains, neck
pains, and more, which you don’t know why considering that you are seated in an ergonomic chair
and your tasks are just light and easy. And you experience these pains constantly. It keeps coming
back after you’ve had a heavenly massage or spa. At times, you’ll think it’s all in your mind.
Twelfth, you become suicidal.
This starts when you are beginning to consider injuring or killing yourself or just acting recklessly
like you’re having a death wish. And, this is what we should avoid. That is why as soon as the signs
of depression show, it is very important that we act on it immediately before the worst comes.
How to cope up with depression?
Come up with a schedule for the day.
When you are depressed, you are weak and you feel like you can’t do anything; that you just don’t like
to do anything for the day. What’s all in your mind is the problem and you keep it running through your
head. Now, one of the ways to avoid that is by coming up a schedule for the day. What are you going
to do? It’s like a mini-itinerary wherein you can include your usual daily activities like taking a bath
or eating breakfast. This is because, again, when you’re depressed, you essentially loss the interest in
almost everything around you including your own self. And, by setting a daily list of activities you can
start to have that direction again and walk through it every day.
Set the day with a goal.
Having this objective can help you get back on track. It awakens that dizzy or sleepy mode in you. It
encourages you to stand up and give it a try once more. It sets your mind into something. In other
words, you have something to look forward to at the end of that day to spark hope and inspiration.
Start an active lifestyle.
When you exercise, your body releases chemical called endorphins, which can actually make you feel
good and better each day. Also, an active lifestyle helps your brain align itself with positivity so you
start to have that hope again, which you must continuously nurture. But, what kind of exercise should
you start with? Having a few minutes of walk or walkathon everyday is already good. And you have a
lot of options to make this happen. If your office is just a walking distance then walk. Whenever it
only takes a few walk to get to where you are going, then please do so. Another way is to use the
stairs instead of the elevator or escalator. But of course, if you have enough time to exercise, then
going to a gym and get a personal trainer is highly recommended.
Eat healthy foods.
Exercise would be useless if you don’t pair it with a healthy and balanced diet. This especially goes
to those who tend to eat a lot when depressed. Instead of eating whatever you want just so you feel
better for a while, learnt to be watchful and go for omega-3 fatty acid rich foods like tuna. Another is
taking in folic acid by eating spinach, avocado and more. These foods are proven and tested to
alleviate depression.
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